Redrow red face

Farnburger twinned with McDonald's

Farnburger twinned with McDonald’s home of Farnburger Central

If you want to have a laugh, read the marketing brochure Redrow has produced for Farnburger Central.

It reads as a holiday brochure: long walks along the Basingstoke Canal, follow a heritage trail, take a walk in a country park.

Maybe it reads like a holiday brochure, because Farnburger Central looks like holiday lets. You know the type, holiday apartments that are featured in Holidays from Hell. Balconies overlooking a busy main road, enjoy the noise and pollution of the traffic. Built alongside a busy airport, enjoy the noise of aircraft, be overpowered by the fumes from spilt fuel, enjoy the thrill of the risk of a plane crash.

The main difference is, holiday lets are only for a couple of weeks, Farnburger Central is residential apartments, though they give every appearance of being holiday lets

Farnburger Central was developed on land that was part of the airfield. It was earmarked for office space, but when the bottom fell out of the market, someone had the bright idea of residential development alongside the runway of a busy airport, and as always, the Rotten Borough of Rushmoor planning committee, ever willing to rubber-stamp any bad development.

Those who live Farnburger Central want out. They complain of inadequate car parking, heavy handed management, even the local Member of Parliament has got involved.

Two-faced hypocritical councillors wring their hands, shed crocodile tears, the very same councillors who rubber-stamped the development.

The woes of Farnburger Central have featured regularly in the local rag.

The biggest load of garbage is that written on Farnburger town centre, whoever wrote it either a congenital liar or has never visited Farnborough.

Farnborough has three vibrant shopping centres – Kingsmead, Queensmead and Princesmead – and boasts a wide range of pubs and clubs.

Er no, it is the place locals with the means avoid. Pound shops, betting shops, charity shops, junk food outlets, boarded-up units, green space and trees destroyed for unwanted development, the only few remaining local businesses to be destroyed. Recently repaved Queensmead, shoddy workmanship, poor quality paving slabs, floods when it rains, a mere £1 million public money down the drain.

A wide range of pubs and clubs. Er, where?

Planning consent has just been passed to demolish The Tumbledown Dick for a Drive-Thru McDonald’s. A c 1720s coaching inn that pre-dates Farnborough. Until its closure, a popular live music venue. Ooops, there goes the heritage.

Still, never mind, those foolish enough to live at Farnborough Central, will be able to drive down to McDonald’s, only do not expect to be able to park your car, as inadequate parking spaces, then on your return, you will find you have lost your parking space at Farnburger Central.

But is this sort of thing not permitted, do you not have to give a fair and accurate description? Well apparently not, not that is if you print a disclaimer.

Property Misdescriptions Act 1991 In accordance with the Property Misdescriptions Act 1991, the information contained in this document is provided for general guidelines only, and does not form the whole or any part of any offer or contract. These particulars should not be relied upon as accurately describing any of the specific matters described by any order under the Property Misdescriptions Act 1991. Customers are strongly advised to contact a Redrow Homes representative for further details and to satisfy themselves as to their accuracy. All information and computer representations contained in this document are taken from design intent material and may be subject to further design development. The dimensions given in the brochure are approximate. They are not intended to be used for carpet sizes, appliance sizes or items of furniture. Images representative only. October 2007.

As always, buyer beware!

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